Thursday, October 14, 2010

Talking About the Taboo: It's Not Just Moxie



The last week or so has been a bit of a whirlwind for me. I attended a caning class held by NEDS on Friday, and on Sunday, Daddy and I attended a wonderful conference being hosted by HiOhMegan at her wonderful Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health.

There were many great speakers and dozens of advocacy groups in attendance. The topic of the conference was Talking About the Taboo. And because the subjects were important, and the speakers were all people I’d have love to have seen, it was DAMNED difficult to choose which sessions to attend. Since I’m as much a sucker for a beautiful woman as the next girl, for the first session we choose to see Logan Levkoff.

Logan is a study in contrasts. She looks more like any other suburban soccer mom. But she’s a smart lady, who spoke honestly about how she has dealt with media in discussing a “Taboo” subject that is important, but one that tends to freak more people out than not. And that is, how to speak to children about sexuality. She showed us how real life “news” interviews work, and talked to us about how she advocates effectively against the biased and skewed opinions of some television hosts and opponents. She showed how body language, attitude, and being really prepared can make a difference so that one doesn’t come off like a freak, but instead presents as an effective educator of sexuality. She also mentioned that it didn’t hurt that she looks like a suburban soccer mom. Not that someone with purple hair and facial piercings and tattoos can’t BE a soccer mom, but when you’re dealing with people whose goal is obfuscate the real issues, it’s better to at least LOOK like you’re on their team.

She described the rudeness sometimes found even from those who have requested her to speak to a subject. She also talked about how she handles the hate email and messages she gets after an appearance. (Hint: she says to respond to it in a forum that you control)

And she touched on what the arguments about sexuality almost always hide. Almost always, when dealing with the subject of sexuality and children, one topic usually wends its way into the conversation. Sometimes so subtly that it’s missed. And that subject is generally the “gay problem”. What people seem to be afraid of more than anything else is that by teaching children that it’s OK to be gay their children will BE gay. Somehow that thought scares people from wanting to be honest with children. And in light of recent events, this attitude seems like a pretty sure-fire way to cause more and more of the same vitriol that has contributed to the horrific suicides and self-harm that of many young people.

All in all, Logan was a fabulous speaker. She is charming, well-prepared and one smart lady. I think I'll add another to my growing list of women I respect and admire and will definitely want to hear again and again.

For the second session, Daddy and I split up. He went to Audacia Ray's talk on media tactics, while I went to see Charlie Glickman's talk on Sex Positivity and Sexual Authenticity. Charlie was also funny, if not exactly as adorable as Logan was. What I took away from his talk were many new ideas concerning my own relationship to sex, communication, and more importantly that it's perfectly ok for me to develop new relationships to both of those things as I change. That's always difficult I think. Learning that I'm actually going to change at points in my life and that things I didn't like before, I might actually enjoy sometime in the future. Of course, this might mean I'll have to try the damned MOXIE again. I'm just not sure if I'm brave enough for that particular perversion at the moment.

After the discussions, I put some bids on items that the CSPH was auctioning off. We managed to take home an Njoy butt plug, some toys for Daddy, and a NELA package.

And, of course, we had the infamous Moxie tasting with Debaucheddiva and Princess Kali. Two friends that are not going to kill me, but also two whose taste in beverages leaves me wondering if I should take InsomniasBitch's offer up on the Cel-Ray next time.

It was a great day at the CSPH. Megan Andelloux is a wonderful host, and I'm looking forward to visiting her facility again, and attending the Third Annual Conference.

PS: If you're interested, check out this twitter hashtag for some quotes from the conference.

PPS: Maymay also did a Kink On Tap from the conference, so if you want to see for yourself, check it out here: Kink On Tap

And PPPS: Here's the infamous video of the Moxie tasting. Thanks to Debaucheddiva and Princess Kali for being such good sports (even if I do NOW question their taste buds)

1 comment:

maymay said...

What a lovely recap of the conference.

Just one note. You wrote:

PPS: Maymay also did a Kink On Tap from the conference, so if you want to see for yourself, check it out here: Kink On Tap

Sadly, the videos on Ustream didn't really come out as well as I'd hoped. Therefore, the far better resource to link to is the slightly cleaned-up version of the audio, available here: Kink On Tap 62: The CSPH 2nd Annual Conference: Talking About the Taboo.

You may also consider linking/embedding the various CSPH advocacy videos I recorded at the conference.