Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Rules are Rules, Or ARE They?

I don't want you to think that Brat behavior happens when you break rules. And because I do not want to end up on the cover of the Dom's Most Hated magazine, I'll tell you that I in no way condone breaking ANY rule. In fact, outright disobedience is not brat behavior. It's rude and not likely to win you any subbypoints with your chosen dominant. Bending rules, however, can lead to some interesting activities.

Brat play relies heavily on rules. Without rules, it's really hard to find something to "push against" while bratting. Some rules are simple, some complex. It's a toss up which kind of rule is easier to bend. But the deal is, your top makes the rules, and then your job as a brat is to decide what to do with it. Anything other than obeying the letter or spirit of the rule is called bending. And this is definitely brat behavior. How else are you gonna know if the rule is the rule....or if it's more in the way of a suggestion?

For every rule, there's a choice you have to make:

a) know when to obey it
b) know when to enforce it
c) know when to bend it
d) know when to break it

Most of the time, I choose to obey them. I truly do want to make Daddy's life easier. OK, so truth be told, following his rules also makes my life easier. Some rules I don't try to bend because they're for my protection or to help me. And some rules I wouldn't dream of bending because to do so, means that his trust in me would be lessened. OK, so there IS one immutable rule that I DO dream of bending from time to time...but I haven't got the balls to do it. Daddy's belly button rule. I'll write a specific post about that one some day. But in the meantime, just know that the Belly Button Rule is one that I'll never break.....probably.....I'm pretty sure. ANYWAY......

Daddy and I don't have what is typically thought of as a "high protocol" relationship. As he's said so many times, "the more rules you make, the more you have to remember". And taking advantage of a temporary loss of memory, sometimes creates interesting choices for brats.

One of my rules is that I am not allowed to wear pantyhose around Daddy. If I do want to wear them, I can ask...but I'm more often surprised when he says yes, rather than when he says no. I do get a pass for tights and leggings in the winter or when teaching a class, but generally, pantyhose are a definite no-no.

I know the rule. But I thought it might be fun to see what would happen if I wore some to a bondage club meeting one night. He'd had some fun another time when cutting off my underwear with his rope cutter and I'd thought it was very hot. Not so much the cutting off part, but the fact that he's started a collection which is kept in his dresser drawer. I'd wondered if he'd cut the pantyhose off given the opportunity, or if he'd made up a rule just because that's what doms are supposed to do. Even knowing they were expensive, even knowing that I really loved them, and even knowing that my friends would shed real tears should they be destroyed. I wanted to see if Daddy was going to enforce his rule. I did ask him if I could wear them before I wore them, but you's damned hard to get an actual answer when your phone is off.

This is called testing and brats should do this with the greatest care, and bearing in mind that in all likelihood, the rule you're testing will be enforced.

When I arrived, I was met by several friends who fell in love with the pantyhose. They weren't ordinary run-of-the-mill ones, but were actually quite lovely, with embroidered designs up the legs, sequins and were actually kind of expensive as pantyhose go. I told my friends that if they wanted them, they'd have to convince Daddy to have me remove them before he cut them off me. Most of them didn't really believe me when I said that it was very likely they'd be cut off me before the night was over. They couldn't believe Daddy would do such a horrible thing to such a lovely pair of pantyhose. It always makes me giggle when they forget Daddy is a "big meanie" in addition to being Mr. Nice Guy. As if sadists aren't supposed to be adorable, cuddly and nice.

And sure enough, later in the evening, Daddy asked me about my rule for pantyhose. I could have told him that I considered bondage club a "class" and therefore had a pass. But instead, I chose to remind him exactly what his rule was. Out came his cutter, and off came the pantyhose. All the while I was watching his face relax into glee while cutting off the offending hose. Plus, he got to make sure his cutter still worked. I was really providing a service dontchaknow. And those around us got to see that [insert domly voice] Daddy Meant Business!

Afterwards, he wondered if he'd perhaps gone too far with enforcing that particular rule. Especially in the light of the cost of the hose, and that it really was a class we were attending. I assured him that I expected it and that if I had truly been worried about it, I wouldn't have worn them, or I would have asked to talk to him about my concerns first. Secretly, I was thrilled that he'd enforced the rule. It let me know that it was a rule that meant something to him and not just one made up for the hell of it. I tested a rule, made a choice about the applicability, and suffered the consequences of that choice. AND, it was indeed, very hot. I could have taken that rule, obeyed they spirit of it, not worn the pantyhose and missed out on that wonderful face he'd had while doing it.

However, bending rules can also be subtle. And bending them for no other reason than having an itchy nose.

Daddy has a rule that when I'm in his rope, I'm not supposed to do anything for myself without asking except breathe and blink. And when your rope of choice is a natural fiber like jute, those damned little pieces can create havoc with your nose.

So what's a brat to do when she's got an itchy nose, and knows that telling Daddy would only result in the devilish bastard not scratching it for me and saying the words that make me want to cry? "Sucks to be you" comes to mind at this moment. Not being allowed to scratch my own nose, and knowing he thinks it's sadistic to make me suffer brings my brat out in full force.

I do what any brat would do faced with the same situation. I bend the "nothing for yourself" rule by waiting till Daddy comes really close and then nuzzle my nose in his neck. OK, so I've kind of broken the rule..but he get some damned serious necknuzzling. Of course I can tell you about this, because he's onto me with this one. Perhaps pretending to faint would be a better way to go?

The point about rules is that breaking them outright seldom works out for a brat. Rules are rules and playing by the rules, knowing what is expected, and enforcing rules is the basis for any relationship. However, bending the rules to suit a particular circumstance, to make a top laugh, or to give you both something that you each want anyway, is a wonderful way to begin stretching your brat wings. Just remember though, breaking a rule because you think it's stupid isn't a good idea. Review the rules, make your choice.....or live with an itchy nose.

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